Why do people commit suicide?
In a nutshell, the most common reason is depression or other mental illness. Those who have never suffered real, clinical depression have no idea how painful it is. They lose their souls. Their brain is going 100 mph constantly, telling them they are shit, that they're worthless. Many leave because they feel they're doing their loved ones a favor.
There is also what is called 'impulsive' or 'impulse' suicide. These are spur-of-the-moment decisions that will pass quickly if there are no means to kill themselves with. This phenomenon was noticed in England after they did away with gas ovens. The suicide rate went way down because people couldn't stick their heads in their ovens to commit suicide anymore!
There are so many reasons, but these are the main two recognized. More later.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Suicide Griever Questions and Answers/FAQ
I've been answering a lot of questions lately pertaining to grief in general and suicide grief in particular and will begin posting some here. This will be a place for suicide Q & A and/or FAQ. I am not a professional, just an avid reader of depression, grief, and suicide since I became a suicide griever 4 years ago. I lost my 31 year old son to depression in 2007. Hard to believe it's been that long. I miss him every minute of every day and my grief still makes itself known, but that passes quickly, usually. He is forever in my heart. So, if anyone has any questions that they want to ask, I'll be happy to answer them to the best of my ability. If you are a new suicide griever, please don't despair of finding happiness again. You will survive this. Suicide survivors are a tough bunch, but we sure don't feel tough at the beginning. It is not a short journey and you have to grieve fully and completely in order to heal...but you will. Suicide grief doesn't have to last forever; it is totally up to you.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
When They Leave
by Joni G These are my personal beliefs and what a lady who can access the Akashic Records told me after my son left. I don't mean to offend anyone!
Since I was about 8 years old, I never bought religion's dogma of an angry, jealous God who sits in judgment of our 'sins'. I've learned He is only love; that we are an actual part of Him. Would you take a child of yours who did something you didn't agree with and throw him into the fireplace? Of course not. Neither would He! I believe Jesus came to tell us we can perform the same miracles as He, but the early church distorted the bible to give them power and control over the people, separating us from God.
When God gave us freewill, it meant He could only sit and watch. He doesn't make bad things happen - we do. He sent His Angels to us to help us along our way. He hopes we do well and He never judges. We do. In book 3 of Conversations With God by Neale Donald Walsch, He talks about suicide, ending with, "I don't punish. I love."
During the early days following Preston's suicide, for some reason my mind's eye was fixated on his L temple, with sweat glistening on it. It would send me into uncontrollable sobbing every time I pictured this! Why I kept seeing this, I don't know. Nothing made sense. I felt I was going out of my mind at times. My main release of these intense emotions was to get in my car and SCREAM at the top of my lungs, cursing at God and the Angels, then just SCREAMING some more. We're talkin' the terrified, monster-is-after-me screaming. The car was the only place I could do it without anyone hearing me. Three years later, I still do it once in a while! While I've come a long way accepting the fact (you have to), I still miss him like crazy and sometimes the tears will come. Most of the time, though, I treasure the gift he was to me and can smile at the memories and realize the joy he brought to my life.
Time will lessen the pain, but you must use that time to go through the whole grieving process. It's too easy to turn grief into prolonged suffering, which you and the loved one who left don't want. I don't think for a minute there is nothing more for us at 'death'. How can that energy we loved just cease to exist? It doesn't. We are eternal beings, striving for perfection. We incarnate on our 3D Earth to experience for God physically. We must know sadness to appreciate happiness. It's all part of getting there. Some suicides are charted and agreed to by everyone involved, even if we don't consciously remember.
When a person is so pained that they take that final act to leave, they are immediately enfolded by their life-long Angels' wings and cocooned in a love we can't even imagine. They are soothed and nurtured by loving beings until the trauma of their just-ended lives is gone. They are never alone, just as they weren't in life, but simply couldn't know it.
There are jobs and activities to do on the Other Side and they soon get busy, many helping other incoming suicides. They always want to assure us of their continuance, but many of us can't hear, see, or understand the signals they send! While Preston was being taken care of, a part of him was able to hang around a bit. That nite, after he'd gone, my mom's phone rang once, which was our signal to call the other. The phone rang at his father's home that nite, too, and his step-brother heard his voice (he hadn't been told what had happened yet), but nothing was registered on the caller ID or answering machine. A friend of my ex SAW him a week or so later, as did my next door neighbor, who could see our driveway and gate in her window's reflection. She saw a friend walk through the gate, followed by Preston! This was the following day. My brother that he lived with used to go astral traveling with him during sleep! He would even wake up, go to the bathroom, back to bed and pick up right where they left off.
I've only had a couple of 'knowings' - one was a dream where I felt him hugging me to let me know he was fine. That has stayed with me to this day and always will. These were enough to convince me of his continuance. I don't need to second guess them or have him try to repeat them over and over. You must trust what you get. It's not the easiest thing for them to communicate with us and then they get busy in their new lives. Of course, they always love us and will be there when it's our turn to transition back Home.
When the awful, awful pain of the first months begins to subside, you must let your guilt go. I don't think there is one of us here who hasn't suffered this damaging emotion. You can't blame yourself and they certainly don't. Let it go. This is the time when you can begin to accept what happened; that it HAS happened and there's nothing to be done that can change it. It's real. That important person is gone from this lifetime.
That void doesn't have to remain empty. You don't have to feel hollow. How did having this person in your life change you? What did this person teach you about life, yourself, and others? What was the legacy they left? As empty as they believed their lives were, there was a purpose to every single one of them, just as there is purpose in our lives. Your lives are richer, fuller, because they were in it. You understand what is truly important...and what isn't.
Since I was about 8 years old, I never bought religion's dogma of an angry, jealous God who sits in judgment of our 'sins'. I've learned He is only love; that we are an actual part of Him. Would you take a child of yours who did something you didn't agree with and throw him into the fireplace? Of course not. Neither would He! I believe Jesus came to tell us we can perform the same miracles as He, but the early church distorted the bible to give them power and control over the people, separating us from God.
When God gave us freewill, it meant He could only sit and watch. He doesn't make bad things happen - we do. He sent His Angels to us to help us along our way. He hopes we do well and He never judges. We do. In book 3 of Conversations With God by Neale Donald Walsch, He talks about suicide, ending with, "I don't punish. I love."
During the early days following Preston's suicide, for some reason my mind's eye was fixated on his L temple, with sweat glistening on it. It would send me into uncontrollable sobbing every time I pictured this! Why I kept seeing this, I don't know. Nothing made sense. I felt I was going out of my mind at times. My main release of these intense emotions was to get in my car and SCREAM at the top of my lungs, cursing at God and the Angels, then just SCREAMING some more. We're talkin' the terrified, monster-is-after-me screaming. The car was the only place I could do it without anyone hearing me. Three years later, I still do it once in a while! While I've come a long way accepting the fact (you have to), I still miss him like crazy and sometimes the tears will come. Most of the time, though, I treasure the gift he was to me and can smile at the memories and realize the joy he brought to my life.
Time will lessen the pain, but you must use that time to go through the whole grieving process. It's too easy to turn grief into prolonged suffering, which you and the loved one who left don't want. I don't think for a minute there is nothing more for us at 'death'. How can that energy we loved just cease to exist? It doesn't. We are eternal beings, striving for perfection. We incarnate on our 3D Earth to experience for God physically. We must know sadness to appreciate happiness. It's all part of getting there. Some suicides are charted and agreed to by everyone involved, even if we don't consciously remember.
When a person is so pained that they take that final act to leave, they are immediately enfolded by their life-long Angels' wings and cocooned in a love we can't even imagine. They are soothed and nurtured by loving beings until the trauma of their just-ended lives is gone. They are never alone, just as they weren't in life, but simply couldn't know it.
There are jobs and activities to do on the Other Side and they soon get busy, many helping other incoming suicides. They always want to assure us of their continuance, but many of us can't hear, see, or understand the signals they send! While Preston was being taken care of, a part of him was able to hang around a bit. That nite, after he'd gone, my mom's phone rang once, which was our signal to call the other. The phone rang at his father's home that nite, too, and his step-brother heard his voice (he hadn't been told what had happened yet), but nothing was registered on the caller ID or answering machine. A friend of my ex SAW him a week or so later, as did my next door neighbor, who could see our driveway and gate in her window's reflection. She saw a friend walk through the gate, followed by Preston! This was the following day. My brother that he lived with used to go astral traveling with him during sleep! He would even wake up, go to the bathroom, back to bed and pick up right where they left off.
I've only had a couple of 'knowings' - one was a dream where I felt him hugging me to let me know he was fine. That has stayed with me to this day and always will. These were enough to convince me of his continuance. I don't need to second guess them or have him try to repeat them over and over. You must trust what you get. It's not the easiest thing for them to communicate with us and then they get busy in their new lives. Of course, they always love us and will be there when it's our turn to transition back Home.
When the awful, awful pain of the first months begins to subside, you must let your guilt go. I don't think there is one of us here who hasn't suffered this damaging emotion. You can't blame yourself and they certainly don't. Let it go. This is the time when you can begin to accept what happened; that it HAS happened and there's nothing to be done that can change it. It's real. That important person is gone from this lifetime.
That void doesn't have to remain empty. You don't have to feel hollow. How did having this person in your life change you? What did this person teach you about life, yourself, and others? What was the legacy they left? As empty as they believed their lives were, there was a purpose to every single one of them, just as there is purpose in our lives. Your lives are richer, fuller, because they were in it. You understand what is truly important...and what isn't.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Earthquake - Made by Man
I had the feeling the 8.9 earthquake in Japan wasn't natural and it wasn't. It was courtesy of the Illuminati to demolish Japan, but it didn't work. While it did cause much damage and fear (which they feed on), our space family was able to diminish the complete devastation. It did release much of the negative energy Earth has built up and it also opened the hearts of people all over the world to pray and that, of course, helps us all.
Suicide is NOT a 'Sin'
Is Suicide an unforgivable sin?
by Joni G
Why does society think a quick death by one's own hand is wrong, while a slow, self-imposed death - such as smoking or eating chemical-laden junk you know is bad for you - isn't? Notice I said society, not God. People, not God, have declared what THEY think is moral, whether you agree or not. Humans conceived the concept of 'sin' - God did not.
God, in order to experience physical life through us, declared that we have free-will, which He does not interfere with. He looks on us with unconditional love. He's like a parent sending children out to play, hoping they don't mess us too badly, but always there with His help if need be. He doesn't judge our actions or cause bad things to happen. It's all up to us. It wouldn't be free-will if this weren't so.
No, suicide is NOT an unforgivable 'sin' because there is no 'sin'. Religions separate us from God by making Him vengeful and feared. This angry and jealous God (human emotions) will forgive you - IF you go to their churches for salvation and give a lot of money. It's nonsense.
My heart aches for parents who have spent their lives believing their children were in purgatory or hell because they committed suicide; or been shamed by being told their loved ones could not be buried in consecrated ground. These kinds of beliefs add further to the awful pain of their loss.
Our children are fine. Do you think God punishes His precious parts because they are in such agony that they can't see any way out? Since God is pure Love and Light, He is incapable of negative emotions. When was the last time your child came to you, hurting, and you threw him or her into the fireplace? God and His Angels enfold and nurture, as we do our own children.
If you're a suicide survivor, you may need spiritual help and the healing it brings, not religious dogma that can make you feel worse. I speak from experience. I would go stark-raving mad if I thought for an instant God had punished my son; my beloved child who was so miserable, so hopeless, that he left the only way he knew. It is not a choice.
There is an excellent book written by Anne Puryear called "Stephen Lives!" Stephen, her son, committed suicide at age 15. The book is about her communications with him since his transformation to the Other Side. It details what happened after his 'death' and his profound grief at the pain he caused his family when he hanged himself. Busy now, he works with other young suicides after they pass over, helping them heal from their trauma.
Never, never place judgment on people who commit suicide or do anything else you disagree with. You have no right and no idea what goes on at soul level. God doesn't punish or judge. He loves and so should we.
by Joni G
Why does society think a quick death by one's own hand is wrong, while a slow, self-imposed death - such as smoking or eating chemical-laden junk you know is bad for you - isn't? Notice I said society, not God. People, not God, have declared what THEY think is moral, whether you agree or not. Humans conceived the concept of 'sin' - God did not.
God, in order to experience physical life through us, declared that we have free-will, which He does not interfere with. He looks on us with unconditional love. He's like a parent sending children out to play, hoping they don't mess us too badly, but always there with His help if need be. He doesn't judge our actions or cause bad things to happen. It's all up to us. It wouldn't be free-will if this weren't so.
No, suicide is NOT an unforgivable 'sin' because there is no 'sin'. Religions separate us from God by making Him vengeful and feared. This angry and jealous God (human emotions) will forgive you - IF you go to their churches for salvation and give a lot of money. It's nonsense.
My heart aches for parents who have spent their lives believing their children were in purgatory or hell because they committed suicide; or been shamed by being told their loved ones could not be buried in consecrated ground. These kinds of beliefs add further to the awful pain of their loss.
Our children are fine. Do you think God punishes His precious parts because they are in such agony that they can't see any way out? Since God is pure Love and Light, He is incapable of negative emotions. When was the last time your child came to you, hurting, and you threw him or her into the fireplace? God and His Angels enfold and nurture, as we do our own children.
If you're a suicide survivor, you may need spiritual help and the healing it brings, not religious dogma that can make you feel worse. I speak from experience. I would go stark-raving mad if I thought for an instant God had punished my son; my beloved child who was so miserable, so hopeless, that he left the only way he knew. It is not a choice.
There is an excellent book written by Anne Puryear called "Stephen Lives!" Stephen, her son, committed suicide at age 15. The book is about her communications with him since his transformation to the Other Side. It details what happened after his 'death' and his profound grief at the pain he caused his family when he hanged himself. Busy now, he works with other young suicides after they pass over, helping them heal from their trauma.
Never, never place judgment on people who commit suicide or do anything else you disagree with. You have no right and no idea what goes on at soul level. God doesn't punish or judge. He loves and so should we.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
You CAN Get Through This
Grief is different for everyone, of course. It is very personal. The main thing you MUST do is express your grief - cry, cry, cry! Tears are healing and grief that is suppressed doesn't go away. It hides and festers until it makes you physically or even mentally ill. I can't stress this enough. Don't ever try to be 'strong' or 'brave' for anyone. Where we got the idea that being stoic when we're dying is the thing to do is anyone's guess. It is ridiculous and damaging. The people who tell you to 'get over it' are idiots. Don't listen to them.
If your grief is new, you must take care of yourself as grief can be quite debilitating. Crawl into a corner if you want. Let others help you. If you don't want to be around people now, that's fine, but do let them help with everyday things that need to be done - shopping, walking the dog, taking the kids, whatever. Friends feel helpless because most don't even know what to say and are relieved when asked to to something...really. The only thing you need to think about now is your Self.
Another poem
Just One Hour More
Dear God, this isn't asking much
I know Your mighty power
Please let me see my son again
If only for an hour.
I need to look into his eyes
Look deep into his soul to see
That his pain is truly gone
That this was meant to be.
Otherwise I'll never know
Why he had to leave
What was going through his mind
What did this achieve?
Only he can tell me, God
Why I lost my son
Why he didn't fight to live
When his life had just begun.
I love him. I forgive him.
I won't forget the joy
Or all the things he meant to me,
My funny little boy.
~For Preston from his mama
Dear God, this isn't asking much
I know Your mighty power
Please let me see my son again
If only for an hour.
I need to look into his eyes
Look deep into his soul to see
That his pain is truly gone
That this was meant to be.
Otherwise I'll never know
Why he had to leave
What was going through his mind
What did this achieve?
Only he can tell me, God
Why I lost my son
Why he didn't fight to live
When his life had just begun.
I love him. I forgive him.
I won't forget the joy
Or all the things he meant to me,
My funny little boy.
~For Preston from his mama
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