You CAN Get Through This

Grief is different for everyone, of course.  It is very personal.  The main thing you MUST do is express your grief - cry, cry, cry!  Tears are healing and grief that is suppressed doesn't go away.  It hides and festers until it makes you physically or even mentally ill.  I can't stress this enough.  Don't ever try to be 'strong' or 'brave' for anyone.  Where we got the idea that being stoic when we're dying is the thing to do is anyone's guess.  It is ridiculous and damaging.  The people who tell you to 'get over it' are idiots.  Don't listen to them.

If your grief is new, you must take care of yourself as grief can be quite debilitating.  Crawl into a corner if you want.  Let others help you.  If you don't want to be around people now, that's fine, but do let them help with everyday things that need to be done - shopping, walking the dog, taking the kids, whatever.  Friends feel helpless because most don't even know what to say and are relieved when asked to to something...really.  The only thing you need to think about now is your Self.

This may all sound like common sense, but the way I got through my grief may be a little different.  I know far too many who are stuck in their grief and can't find their way out.  This doesn't have to be.